Sunday, June 21, 2009
10:55 AM
I woke up this morning,disheartened,grieved, perturbed. It's not a dream..it's for real..I'm posted to 3 SIR.great.It's a totally new environment,and being expected to behave like a trained soldier, I must be able to adapt to communal living without any sweat. But all of us must understand the composition of 3 SIR, after all, it targets at the standard batch, you know..people without much education. That concerns me because how can a Lion live with a Cat? ( okay I'm obviously the lion because I'm superior). you know? different social class? Okay, I shall not rant anymore....I believe it's retribution. for all the bad deeds I've done that I'm being posted to this unit. urgh!I'm in distress. and the bereavement is climbing. almost over flowing. soon.I now feel inferior to my friends- who are either in OCS or SISPEC. They're commanders and I'm a man. They're drawing higher pay. They're lives ( this 2 years) will be filled with so much fun( im assuming this because they're mixing with people of their callable). I'll feel out casted when I meet them. seriously. and I know I'll be bitter. very very bitter.But...what can I do? appeal? HAHAHA * hysterically*
When my life gives me lemon, I make lemonade. ( Alternatively, you can sell the lemon, put those lemon into your sugar cane juice or squeeze some on your fish and chips)
Thursday, June 18, 2009
10:50 PM
It has been a while, quite some time. I've been thinking a lot these days, whether ( weather, as someone spelt) I've made the right choice. Moving away from something that I've accustomed to over the years is indeed an intimidating affair. Difficult, is definitely an understatement. Am I really " this type" ( as many will put it) of student? Will there be a cultural shock? Till today, I cannot subscribe to the idea of " choosing something that you like". I'm having a hard time, trying to convince my mind and soul that, that alone will suffice. Shouldn't earning me a rice bowl superior to my interest? Can interest secure me economically? socially? ( by that, I guess I mean social status)Whatever the case, I guess there is no turning back now. Unless............................never mind, doubt I will do it. hahaI have a friend who recently mentioned ( indirectly) that he is ready to settle down. He feels he has the mental maturity to commit to a relationship that,supposedly, last forever. What he is lacking ( from his perspective) is money. To me, it's an insane concept, something that I cannot and will not accept and will never ever comprehend- the idea of early marriage. I think it's a joke ( and it amuses me even more when he spelt out his intentions because from my opinion, he's a kid, totally). Without checking the dictionary, Marriage to me compasses an array of factors ( or to put it simply, things that are related to marriage) and that includes money, social life, education, parents approval, social background, housing, privacy, commitment, trust,friends.....yada yada yada. So how would a teenager ( so that it doesn't seem I'm targeting him) at let say..16 years old, able to have a good grasp of all the factors? seriously?! seriously??!!I'm zzzzz ( sorry for the lack of vocab) i really want to LAUGH OUT LOUD. ( finally I can use "lol" in a proper context)
Saturday, June 6, 2009
10:55 PM
My journey has just begun.fun day with loved ones.
